Lynzie’s blog

So today has probably been the slowest day of my life. I work in an office on campus during the week and Fridays are horrible. They feel like they are never going to end. It's about 4:30 right now, I've been here since 10:00 and I really want to shoot myself!

 

I'm going out for my future sister-in-law's birthday and I'm not very excited about it. I don't really like her, and she doesn't really like me. It was definitely a curtosy invite. I can't even drink to get her to not be so annoying. The only reason I'm really going is because the other sister-in-law will be there and I like her. Well, I love her to be quite honost. Sometimes more than the fiance. :]

 

Another reason for this being a bad day: My son is almost 11 months. He is getting the balance thing down. I think his standing record is like 15 seconds without help. He went to my mom's today and about 10 minutes before I got to work she called and told me that he took a step. He didn't walk around her living room or anything like that. She said he was standing by her for a few seconds and then decided he wanted to be closer to her and lifted one foot and stepped it toward her, put his hand on her knee and fell. That was the extent of it, but it's still a huge deal to me! She said it wasn't worth writing in the baby book or anything. So it gets me thinking. I work or go to school 6 days a week. MTRF he is at day care from 8:30 to 5:30, and on the weekends, he is at my moms while I'm working. Chances are I won't get to see his first real step. I missed the first time he crawled and the first time he sat up alone, and probably the first time he pulled himself up on something. He was with my mom when his first tooth was noticed. I'm missing every moment of my son's life due to work and school. It makes me want to quit it all and just be with him 24/7 so I don't miss anything. But at the same time, I realize I am working and going to school to make his life better than mine was. In the long run, he won't care so much if I missed his first step opposed to not having food on the table. I feel like I have my priorities in line. My son is my EVERTHING. So sacrificing a few trivial things won't really matter to advance our lives, right? Let's hope he cares more about having a nice home and being able to have everything he needs more than me missing his first steps!

 

So the question of the day was something about having tried something I wasn't good at.

 

YESSIR. Of course I have, isn't that part of being human? To not be perfect at everything, to having flaws. So let's list the things I suck at: driving, standing up for myself, cleaning, quitting bad habits, being a good friend, keeping my mouth shut, saying no when I need to, handling my anger responsibly, being responsible, saving money, amongst many other things. Haha. I really have a decent self-esteem. Promise.